Friday, August 18, 2006
herbarium: plantain
Summer and the road’s tar rhizomes tangle up
with plantain's root stout like a brown betty
broad like middle-aged spread
its rosettes and long brown and mustard spears
spit-polished by the morning’s rain
inside the park the clover that marched across the meadow
a month ago is now so done
dun and dry
it is as if the season has held a match and a cupped hand
to every pinked pollen-heavy head
further in the reintroduced grasses
presenting rapunzel rope ladders under the veil of soil
swaying heads above
screen white cabbage moths wasps
from the middle distance
* * *
Nothing like shaking loose the fragments and snatches of poetry littering my desk and my head. It makes up for this summer's heat wave, for the quick-stepping-hope-baby-doesn't-freak early morning walks through the forest, for typing with one hand.
Fun!
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5 comments:
Another day, another draft. This one seemed a little flabby and distended (yes, yes, I know...dangerous descriptors for a new mother to use) so I've tightened a bit, re-christened it.
That and the addition of a line at the end of the poem brings it into the sphere of the growing collection of preggers/baby poems loitering on my desktop.
* * *
Afterbirth: a walk in the park
Summer and the road’s tar rhizomes tangle up
with plantain's root stout like a brown betty
its broad rosettes and long brown and mustard spears
spit-polished by the morning’s rain
inside the park
the clover that marched across the meadow
a month ago is now so done dun and dry
it is as if the season has held a cupped hand
and a match to every pinked pollen-heavy head
further in the reintroduced grasses
presenting rapunzel rope ladders under the veil of soil
swaying heads above
screen white cabbage moths wasps
from the middle distance
and the centre
of your wet howl
Wow, good revision - any ideas I may have had for suggestions popped out of existence when I opened your comment. Bang up, Ariel. And I miss you.
Jill
Hey Gilly - sorry to have been neglectful! Expect a missive over the next day or so...
I agree with Jill - good revision!
I wonder these lines
a month ago is now so done dun and dry
it is as if the season has held a cupped hand
and these
a month ago is now done dun and dry
as if the season has held a cupped hand
and these
from the middle distance
and the centre
of your wet howl
or these, without the "your" and instead upping the "howl" by giving it its own line
from the middle distance
and the centre of a wet
howl
Thanks B...always always appreciate your input on poetry.
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